'Don't act like a father now if you've never acted like one before': Biological Dad Shunned From Wedding Day Tradition When Daughter Chooses Stepfather to Walk Her Down the Aisle

Author image for Sienna Varady
Sienna Varady
Jan 5, 2024 3:00 PM EST

On your special day, having your father walk you down the aisle to your handsome and devoted husband-to-be is customary. It is intended to symbolize the father's blessing on his daughter as she assumes her new responsibilities as a wife and mother. But why not personalize the custom to make it exclusively for you? Regardless of biological kinship, why not pick the person you hold in the highest regard to walk you down the aisle on your big day?

The following story goes into greater detail on this subject and tells the tale of a girl with two fathers. OP is fortunate to have found love and acceptance from her mother's ex-husband, who treats her like a daughter and loves her unconditionally. On the other hand, her biological father never really fulfilled his paternal obligations. OP is pregnant and ready to tie the knot, but she can't decide who should walk her down the aisle. Should it be her biological father, as would be expected traditionally, or her stepfather, as he has been in her life through both happy and challenging times? 

So, to find out more about what transpired and which of the two men deserves the privilege of walking OP down the aisle, read the story below! And after you're done, read the story about the sister who, out of spite, refuses to attend her brother-in-law's wedding!

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  • 01
    "AITBA for not wanting my biological dad to walk me down the aisle?"
    via Canva
  • 02
    AITBA For not wanting my biological dad to walk me down the aisle?
    via u/babyj727
  • 03
    Backstory: A little after I was born maybe a year or so. My parents split up. My mom ended up marrying my first stepdad. They were together for about seven years before they divorced and my mom married my current stepdad. Growing up my dad wasn't always
    via u/babyj727
  • 04
    around even though, he had stepdaughter she went to the same school and were in the same grade as me. When I was younger, I often defended my biological dad from my mom, my older sister, and my older brother, because they would always tell me
    via u/babyj727
  • 05
    how bad of a dad he was when it came to certain things. Me and my sister and my brother would get into ugly screaming matches About my dad I've always wanted a good relationship with my real dad, but honestly, it was a very off relationship due to him not
    via u/babyj727
  • 06
    coming around as much. When it was the summer going into my sophomore year, me and my sister decided to move with my dad. Her reasons were totally different than mine as she moved in with him because she wanted to be with the boyfriend my mom did not like. I
    via u/babyj727
  • 07
    moved with my dad because, I was tired of my mom micromanaging every little thing that I did. After we moved in my sister left about a year after. For the next year and a half I tried to have a good relationship with my dad and overly do things for him.
    via u/babyj727
  • 08
    Always wanting to spend time with him Force myself to be interested in the things that he was interested in order for us to be close. It was evident that he would put his foot down for me as they get everything brand new for
    via u/babyj727
  • 09
    the school year, and I would just get their hammy downs. Even though the majority of their stuff didn't fit a month before I turned 18 I moved back in with my mom after me and my stepmom got into it. A few months later I became pregnant and made
    via u/babyj727
  • 10
    amends with them. Honestly, I don't remember if I even got an apology little by little my dad stopped looking for me and honestly, I stopped reaching out just because I never got an apology and I never really healed from the situation of him not
    via u/babyj727
  • 11
    standing up for me. Little by little the relationship started to die off and even though I'm upset with him, I still have so much love for him a few months ago he had a heart attack that put him in the hospital and some stuff had happened at the hospital between
    via u/babyj727
  • 12
    my stepsisters and me. Of course my dad was told about it, but he never reached out to apologize for anything. Now onto the main problem, me and my boyfriend have been talking about getting married and about the whole wedding party. My mom, my two stepdad's his
    via u/babyj727
  • 13
    mom, his dad, my siblings, his siblings, all of that... And when it came to being walked down the aisle I was stumped. I love my real dad and have always wanted him to walk me down the aisle but of course he doesn't exactly the " father" when it comes to my life. My first stepdad have been there
    via u/babyj727
  • 14
    since I was two and still is here in my life even though him and my mom are not married anymore and my current stepdad has done an amazing job, raising me from age 9 until now, and has helped me throughout my pregnancy when I needed help. Honestly, I don't want my real dad walking
    via u/babyj727
  • 15
    me down the aisle because he has not really been through accomplishments and hasn't helped me the way my other dad have... So am I the bad apple for not wanting him to walk me down the aisle?
    via u/babyj727
  • 16
    Kemintiri 11 hr. ago I'm sorry, but has he even asked about it? Personally, I'd do the first step dad, or both of they mean alot to you. You can walk by yourself. Good luck.
    via u/babyj727
  • 17
    tatang2015 · 7 hr. ago Don't forget your mom!
    via u/tatang2015
  • 18
    TwilightAria 9 hr. ago I think it is best to avoid having the conversation at all and walk down the aisle yourself. Or if they are okay with it, having both of your super supportive step dads
    via u/TwilightAria
  • 19
    walk you down the aisle, if you really want them over him and you can't decide. As for not wanting your bio dad to walk you down the aisle, it's 2024, it's your decision, you aren't his property and
    via u/TwilightAria
  • 20
    it's not what it really about anymore, it's about you having the support you want to walk down the aisle in your treasured moment, and that can be you step dad, your mum, your second grade teacher, or the guy you
    via u/TwilightAria
  • 21
    buy your lunch from, anyone who has been there through your life who is special to you and YOU want there. So NTBA.
    via u/TwilightAria
  • 22
    Fun-Yellow-6576. 10 hr. ago Not the bad apple. It's your wedding and you can't ask whoever you want to walk you down the aisle, or you can walk yourself down the aisle.
    via u/Fun-Yellow-6576
  • 23
    completedett 10 hr. ago Do it with both your stepdads or your mom because she has been the all constant in your life.
    via u/completedett
  • 24
    Physical-Trust-4473. 8 hr. ago When I got married I had found wording online that said something like who stands with this person instead of who gives them away. And at that
    via u/Physical-Trust-4473
  • 25
    point then everybody on the one side would stand up and then the efficient would say it for the other side and then everybody on that side would stand up and it was pretty nice and not patriarchal so maybe think outside the box.
    via u/Physical-Trust-4473
  • 26
    Soft-Gift7252 · 6 hr. ago You're not the bad apple. Forget anyone's feelings but your own for a minute. What do you want?
    via u/Soft-Gift7252

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